‘Menfem’ or just too fem?

Last week, as I meandered through the oncoming crowd to the Central line at Oxford Circus - there he was, coming towards me - it was like the parting of the waves – at that moment I saw no-one else among the hundreds of commuters but him…This wasn’t because of an instant trigger of attraction - Hell no! I was taken aback for a very different reason. This 20-something man had the tightest, fitted outfit I’ve ever seen on a straight man that was not on a stage performing or a bodybuilder!!

Picture this...the skinniest skinny jeans that put the original wearers of the said jean (old school rockers like Iggy Pop or Steven Tyler) to shame. On top; his waistcoat and t-shirt had so much Lycra his girlfriend must surely wear them too. His footwear; ultra-pointy patent shoes – enough already!! Topping it off literally, his hair, styled and straightened to perfection into what can only be described as a forward-swept mullet. The look was ultra-fem.

Men’s fashion over the last decade has gradually taken on a female slant and the result, a blend of masculine and feminine that a lot more men are wearing with pride nowadays. After seeing that guy I asked myself why didn’t I find that look attractive? Why was I uncomfortable with seeing a straight man embrace this look and be comfortable in it? Am I too old school? Yes I am yet very new school. I love it when a man is groomed, tailored and stylish, what I don’t love is when this new-age masculinity is taken too far.

I study style and fashion on daily basis, and love looking at men and women and am intrigued by what people wear. I think of young teenage couples I’ve seen out and about in London, there have been so many times at a glance I thought were a same-sex couple, when in fact, after closer inspection have turned out to be a boy and a girl!!

These looks which I call ‘Menfem’ give men much more style choices as the fit creates a look that can really define personal style and I’m definitely up for that. It’s just not a look I’d want my man to adopt. I equate a ‘real’ man (whatever that means) with a more masculine tailored fit and look, skintight and girly just doesn’t do it for me. For instance, I’ve always loved Prince in so many ways, but his feminine look/style has never made me fancy him in the slightest. Am I being too narrow-minded? Tell me if I am, as I understand this is a sign of the times – ever-changing, morphed roles for men and women. This blend, switch or confusion is so evident and also reflected in fashion.

Look around you - what do you see?

© Karma-Style 2010


Anonymous said...

I think it's because you identify a "real man" with a certain look and style. When really I think, if you were asked to describe your version of a real man, you'd only come up with a set of behaviours (i.e. strong, assertive etc).

I suppose the way around it, is to rethink the notion that someone looking feminine doesn't have to actually make them feminine.
Just an idea.

Camillea said...

No that's a great insight, which I'll take on board - Thank you anonymous!

Judy Balan said...

Okay, I am totally old school and just not great at compartmentalization. If a guy *looks* feminine, I'm not going to take the time to figure out if that really makes him feminine. I just turn my attention to someone who's more well, masculine by my definition.

Personal biases are just that. We don't have to beat ourselves up for it! So go ahead and think what you will about the straight guy in skinny jeans, I say! After all,wouldn't life be so darn boring without our unique oddities and pet peeves? :))